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Mother from Illinois reveals a stranger became her egg donor after multiple failed pregnancies

'A stranger offered to be our egg donor after our failed attempts to have a baby'

By Natalie Oliveri|

When Elena Ridley began writing a blog about her struggle to become pregnant, she never imagined a total stranger would one day give her a baby.

The 32-year-old needed an outlet to share her frustrations about her infertility. Her online journal initially started to document her pregnancy journey but she and husband Joe soon found out that falling pregnant wasn't going to be what they'd imagined.

They had spent two years trying to conceive naturally, followed by three years of IVF with no success.

Elena and Joe, who live in Illinois, in the United States, had nearly given up on being parents.

Elena and her husband wanted to become parents more than anything. (Instagram/lenaridley)

That is, until Elena received a message from one of her social media followers, Amy, offering to be a surrogate.

"It was a total shock and coming from a stranger I was just so blown away by it because it¡¯s a huge sacrifice to go through an entire pregnancy, give up ten months of your life and give that end product to someone else," Elena tells 9Honey.

"It was definitely a shocking message to get but really awesome at the same time to know that a total stranger would be willing to do something like that for someone she didn¡¯t even know.

"It was just kind of mind blowing because we didn¡¯t know her at all."

Their journey changed when Amy got in contact, offering to help. (Instagram/lenaridley)

Elena had been researching egg donation after one of her doctors gently suggested it was their only option. It had taken her a little while to accept the idea.

"When I had found that out, I was totally against the whole thing," Elena explains.

"But once I started to realise what was happening and that maybe things weren¡¯t going to work out with my eggs, I started looking at donor profiles online."

Elena was adamant that if they were to choose an egg donor, she didn't want to know much about the woman besides the basics.

"I was thinking to myself, 'I don¡¯t really want to have any ties to this person, I don¡¯t really want to know anything more about them than what I can find out online'. But the more I started accepting the idea, the more I started changing that idea even more."

One night while she was browsing donor profiles, she received a message from Amy who would eventually become an egg donor for Elena and Joe, rather than a surrogate.

Elena considered the woman's offer for some time before telling her husband. She was worried about how he'd react, considering her own initial feelings towards using the help of another woman.

Elena gave birth to Georgia June, in 2017. (Instagram/lenaridley)

"For me personally, I never thought that we would get to that point [but] because of what the doctor had said, we both had an idea in our heads that that might be the route that we would go one day.

"I just think it was something that, maybe, he didn¡¯t think was going to be happening so quickly.

"But he came around pretty easily and pretty quickly after I had given him some of the details of her and showed him her picture and told him we had been talking for a while."

Despite Elena initially not wanting to form a relationship with a potential egg donor, she and Amy had developed a unique friendship over the three months they were speaking online.

"I think I was just resentful towards [egg donation] having to be the route that we were going to go," Elena explains.

The couple were thrilled to become parents after years of infertility. (Instagram/lenaridley)

"At first I didn¡¯t really want a relationship with my egg donor and then I really came around to the idea, liking the idea of knowing her and having our potential children be able to know her and being able to meet her and her kids and everything too."

The couple travelled to Georgia in March, 2016, to meet Amy and her family.

"It just felt like it wasn¡¯t even our first time meeting because we had been talking for so long," Elena says.

"It was very easy and relaxed."

Elena and Joe also met Amy's daughter and son, then aged 7 and 2. Over several days, the two families got to know each other even more.

"We hung out at their house and hung out with their kids ¨C it was just very relaxed and an easy-going couple of days.

"They¡¯re totally people that we would be friends with if the situation was different."

Elena says it was "reassuring" to see Amy's healthy and happy children.

Georgia June will turn two in February. (Instagram/lenaridley)

"Either one, her son or her daughter, it could be how our kids [would turn out] so it was totally awesome to meet them."

Three months later Elena became pregnant using her husband's sperm and Amy's donor egg. She gave birth to daughter, Georgia June, in February 2017.

"The name has a lot of meaning behind it," Elena says.

"Georgia was conceived in the lab in June in [the state of] Georgia and my birthday and my husband¡¯s birthday are both in June, so June had a lot of significance for us as well. And June is my grandma's name."

Their daughter will be 2 years old in February and is developing a close relationship with Amy's children, who are also Georgia's her half-siblings.

"She¡¯s still so young so she doesn¡¯t really understand anything but she¡¯s a very, very social child so she gets along with them great, she loves being around them and playing with them."

Elena and her husband are hoping to have another child one day. (Instagram/lenaridley)

It's a special relationship that will continue to grow.

Elena is hoping to have a second child using another of Amy's eggs.

"Our embryos are in Georgia so we stay with them at their house, spend a couple of days with them trying to get as much time with them as we can," Elena says.

But her attempts at becoming a mother for the second time are proving problematic having suffered two miscarriages this year.

The most recent was in November.

"I¡¯m fearful of going through all this again," Elena says.

"We have three embryos left and if they don¡¯t work for us, it will probably be the end of the road."

Elena can't thank Amy enough for helping her to become a mother.

She tells 9Honey that although it didn't happen how they'd imagined it, she and her husband now have a family through the "non-traditional way".

And that's the message Elena wants her followers to understand ¨C there are many different ways to create a family.?

"We pretty much just owe her everything because she gave up everything, just out of nowhere, to help a total stranger," Elena says.

"So many people aren¡¯t willing to do something for each other anymore, so for a stranger to do something like that was just huge."

Follow Elena's story via her blog and on Instagram

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