Emily's gift to her dying father Mark: 'He was just so happy'

Emily and her father Mark were always close, in particular during her later years of her high school.

"He was a teacher and I went to the school across the road from where he was teaching, so we would spend a lot of time together," she tells 9honey.

"He he taught me how to drive. We would drive to and from school together."

Emily had just graduated and was about to start a degree at Melbourne University when her dad mentioned he had "a bit of a sore tummy."

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"He didn't really think anything of it," she says. "He went to the GP just for a general checkup and they ran some tests just for the sake of it.

"And then they [the tests] came ?back positive for bowel cancer."

Mark was told his cancer was Stage 4 and terminal, having already spread to his liver and his lungs.? He was diagnosis when Emily was just 18?.

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"We had like a family meeting which was really rare for us, just in the living room on the couches," she recalls.

"I'd actually just gotten back from the beach. I'd been at a girl's weekend just to finish up high school before we all went away to uni and came back that afternoon and basically hadn't even unpacked my stuff yet," she says.

"They sat us down and said, 'Look, we've got something to tell you.' I was a bit upset because they'd actually known for a few days but they didn't want to ruin my little holiday with the girlfriends by breaking the news.

Emily adds: "Because I would have come back earlier. They wanted me to finish off the holiday and then let me know."

Emily knew immediately she would do everything she could to care for her father. The family were able to move his care to the Peter MacCallum Cancer Centre which was across the road from Emily's university.

Her plan was to study science and eventually medicine.

"?It was really, really tough," she says. She struggled to balance her studies with caring for her dad and felt isolated during this time.

Emily was operating on very little sleep when she contacted Canteen for help.

Canteen has found 55 percent of young people first access the organisation when they are experiencing "clinical distress" with four out of five young people experiencing meaningful improvements after reaching out for help.

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"I saw a magnet on the fridge in oncology and it said: 'Is cancer your world?' I looked it up. It sounded exactly like me.

"I just filled in the online form and they reached out and said they'd love to meet me. The Canteen office is right in the hospital precinct. A few weeks later ?I was on a retreat which got me away from it all. I was able to have a break because I felt like I wasn't stopping," she says.

"And I met people who truly got it."??

Mark battled the disease ?for over two years.

"He was a very stoic man," she says. "He was in the Australian Army so for him to have to be cared for was ridiculous for him. At one state he had drains coming out of him... he was still walking home. He was walking to and from his appointments. For anyone else it would have been too much, but not him."

Emily says "it was an honour and a privilege to be there for my dad."

"I definitely wouldn't take it back," she says. "I could be there for him and help him when I could. But he really just wanted to fight right until the very, very end."

She says her father eventually accepted he would die from his disease. He passed away on July 10, 2019.

During his long battle, there were still happy moments for the father and daughter.

"With treatment, you're on chemo and then you're off and you're on radiation and various surgeries and then various reactions," she recalls. "Some things went well and some things didn't. But there were breaks in there and Canteen was fantastic as well because they gave us rec days and opportunities to enjoy life and enjoy the days that we did have and to make the most of it."

Canteen organised for Emily and Mark to attend the Grand Prix which is "something dad absolutely loved."

"It was a big blessing and a great memory that I'll cherish forever, because he was just so happy."

Emily would eventually switch degrees, studying to become a nurse, inspired by those who helped care for her father.

"I wanted to be that nurse for someone else," she says.

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