Mum's regret after realising baby daughter's name sounds like a 'virus'
By Merryn Porter |
We all know choosing a moniker for your child is difficult, and thanks to the internet and social media, 'name regret' is often a common topic.
But sometimes even the most innocuous name can seem just fine, until you say it out loud, as one mum found out.
The woman, who called herself Pricklyperlatook to Reddit's namenerds thread yesterday with a post entitled, "Help with name regret."
The woman said that 18 months after the birth of her daughter, she still feels "regret and sadness around the name we chose."
"We chose 'Genevieve Iris' after months of indecision and deliberation, and only under pressure from the hospital staff to complete the birth certificate before leaving the hospital," she said.
"Unfortunately, almost as soon as we settled on the name and informed all of our friends and family, I had regret," the woman began, before listing her concerns about her daughter's name.
But it was the combination of her daughter's first and second names that was causing the most angst, she explained.
READ MORE: Viral video of baby's head being shaved divides internet: 'This feels illegal'
"I'm afraid the first/middle combo sounds like 'virus' when you say it quickly," she said, sounding out 'Genevee Virus'.
She also listed other concerns.
"My husband's family is mostly of Mexican descent and the first name has no connection to his family's language or culture," she said.
"We've chosen the nickname 'Vivi' (which we pronounce 'Veevee'), and I'm not sure I really like this nickname, nor am I even sure I like Genevieve anymore.
"I kept thinking the anxiety over her name might have been due to postpartum depression, and I had hoped the negative feelings around the name would subside.
"Unfortunately, they haven't, and I still feel a huge amount of regret. I feel like I've let my daughter down."
She said she and her husband considered "pretty much every single Spanish/English name" but almost all were rejected due to a family member of his sharing the name and/or his not wanting to use it for some reason.
"The bilingual aspect of the name was also not important to him at all, so I ended up giving up trying to work that into our name choice," she said.
"I realise it's too late to change the name (my daughter already refers to herself as 'Weewee' (she can't pronounce her V's yet).
"I guess I'm hoping for any thoughts/support you might have.
"Has anyone been through this before (realising too late that you may never be able to get over your name regret)?
"If so, what did you do? Do you think it's too late to change the legal name to something like Viviana but keep the nickname?
"I honestly think she has no idea what her actual name is because everyone has pretty much exclusively referred to her as 'Vivi' since she was born."
Commenters were mostly supportive.?
"I don't hear 'Virus' at all, and it's rare you're even going to be saying 'Genevieve Iris', especially as she gets older," said one commenter, adding they thought changing the name "at this point is a bit late" but reassured her "you're not letting your daughter down, you gave her a beautiful name."
"There's so many wonderful things about the name 'Genevieve'," said another. "Multiple nickname options, but not too much of a mouthful to go by the full name. It's timeless, and doesn't sound dated or trendy at all to me."
Another said, "I cannot recall the last time I have said my kids middle names or even my own. It's a non-issue. And at 18 months there's lots of time to make new nicknames. Gen, Genny, Viva, Ina, Gina, Gena, Eva or Eve or Evie.?"
"Genevieve is a beautiful name. Under pressure, you guys picked a beautiful name and it has so many options as she gets older with a nickname. It will suit her well every stage of her life," said another.
But others said it wasn't too late to change her daughter's name.
"Not too late to change the name. If they're still feeling regret after 18 months, just rip the Band-aid off and change it, the sooner the better," said one.
"I actually don't think it's too late to change the name. My niece goes exclusively by her middle name กช her mum had name regret also and started using her middle name when she was about 18 months old also. I'm willing to bet that most family members don't even remember the switch over. She suits her middle name and loves it กช her birth name literally never comes up. She's 13 now and wants to legally change to her middle when she can."
The same person said they did not think her current name was an issue. "I get what you're saying about the virus sound but you'd have to be saying it out loud really quickly, which no one really ever does anyway."
The woman said all of the comments had been incredibly helpful as it was "such a hard thing to talk about with friends and family because it feels so embarrassing to still be here 18 months later."
She agreed the nickname she had chosen for her daughter was "a large part of my regret" and wondered if changing it would help "with the negative feelings I have about the name."
For a daily dose of 9Honey, subscribe to our newsletter here
